Sunday, September 21, 2008

AM I OVER IT YET? Detoxing at Your Own Pace


What is it about human nature that seems to require a certain time table on recovery? Why do we think we should be over something or somone in a few months or at most in a year? Do you ever find yourself asking 'Just how long is this recovery thing going to take?'

You may be sailing along feeling pretty much 'OVER IT' when something triggers a memory and there you are, smack dab in the middle of THE OLD PAIN again, seething over the fact that you had to endure such abuse in the first place.

In the last 3 years we have found that the Old Pain does resurface and at random times. There's no way to really head it off (other than choose denial which only delays a crash for later) so the best thing to do is process it as it comes and try not to feel responsible for having to deal with it again. Oh WELL, you need to say, I AM getting better and I am MUCH better off than I was before I emerged from the situation I needed recovery from.

So in other words, embrace your own pace. You are uniquely you. When you factor in every aspect of your life that makes you, you, then you can surrender to the realization you aren't on someone else's path, you are on your own journey.

Thank God the Holy Spirit is here with each of us walking us through to the next steps. The Holy Spirit is here to help us and lead us into all truth.

9 comments:

getting there said...

I am in detox, my 4th month.. thanks for you blog! It's good to find people and blogs that relate!

NoJoke said...

Hi Getting there! So glad you found us and wish you the best in your recovery! We are all in this together!

Lil Ms. Independent said...

Just wanted to say I found your blog and really like what I see! I left a toxic church about 2 years ago and I'm still having a hard time going back to church. The process is slow and painful, and was exacerbated by a year at a conservative Christian college. But there's hope for the future, right?

NoJoke said...

Indie! Yes, there is hope for the future - although the process in getting over it is a long one! But still, being free is worth it all! Some of us have a hard time even reading the bible - same as church - so just go when you have energy to go and just read when you have energy to read! It's all about getting your OWN faith back and there's really no real right or wrong way! That's appealing to Independents like us!!

G.W. said...

It's been 14 months.Why should I get over it? We are not talking about something that happened to myself alone, but people who came and left our church over 20 years. Although a large number of people left our old church, many are still there. Am I going to get over my compassion for them and others who are in controlling churches? Maybe I should get over my concern for the direction of modern Christianity in general. My advice is that if you are not over it, don't rush it. Alert others.
http://theautonomyofthebeliever.blogspot.com/

Carrie said...

hello!
yes recovery, sometimes I feel like I was in a very bad accident one that has left me with a limp also when I wake up every Sunday with an aching spirit.

but I thank God I have my life back every day that I have lived with the truth, I thank God I got away from the evils of man made ways to God.

5 years and counting

NoJoke said...

5 years - what a milestone - thanks for the encouragement Carrie, since this is year 4 for us. It's finally dawned that we may never get certain 'desires' back or ever fit in neatly into the Christian Culture as it exists today - but like you, we wouldn't trade it for the world.

Recovering Alumni said...

It's been 10 years for me and still the old pain comes up from time to time. Thanks for the comfort in this post to know that I'm not alone.

NoJoke said...

Wow, Recovering Allumni, 10 years and still feeling pain - I guess we can now give up the illusion that it'll ever be over, but that's ok. we are recently a little past the 5 year mark and am not over it yet - but immensely freer and more determined to speak out when the opportunity arises. i feel a blog post perculating!